SECUUUURITY!

Bad missionary.

Sucky mom and wife.

Horrible Spanish.

Friend-less.

F-A-T.

Have you ever felt you just can't get any area of your life together?! That even in the slightest moment of victory, the evil one likes to kick you in the shins and say, "YOU'RE WORTHLESS!!!" 

Over the last several weeks I've experienced that evil booger in my face working, even showing himself through the most unexpected people, to remind me that I can't get anything right. 

PLEASE tell me, it's not just me! 

It seems Satan pinpoints the areas that mean the most (work, family, ministry, relationships, etc.) and makes you feel so small. 

It's gotten to the point where I've avoided others and even canceled plans because of my insecurities.

Just this last week we were invited to a social gathering at Josiah's classmates home. I thought of every single excuse I could conjure up until I finally had to admit that I was nervous to speak to new people in Spanish.

It may sound ridiculous to you, but even after 5 years and being married to a Spanish-speaking man... I know my Spanish is not perfect and makes me feel very incompetent. The girls/women that I teach have just gotten used to my errors, but new people don't know me.

I already stand out, I just don't want to sound like an idiot.

SIDE NOTE. I went... and had fun :)

Then areas like motherhood have been a real kick in the gut. I appreciate honesty, but after hearing "How are yooouuuu going to handle TWO?!" enough times really makes me wonder the same thing. An unhealthy reminder that I must have reeeallly messed up my first kid, couldn't even keep my second one alive and might end up in the loony bin with my third.

Do you see how Satan does it?! What a JERK!

I thought this was just a woman problem until I asked Robersy recently. Apparently we all struggle!

But just as quickly as fiery darts have been thrown, CHRIST has stepped in.

No. HE hasn't given me a participation trophy or even stuck a "You're AWESOME!" sticker on my chest. But HE has reminded me of who HE is and who I am IN HIM.

Just the other week I began preparing a new study in Ephesians. SIDE NOTE. If you want to wallow in your insecurities, do not study Ephesians! 

Then, even in the midst of studying Ephesians chapter 1 in depth, I sat in a Biblical Counseling conference where we spent quite a bit of time on understanding our identity in CHRIST.

I found as GOD clarified my identity as HIS daughter... chosen, loved, adopted, etc. was at the forefront of my mind I wasn't so hung up on who I'm not, but rather who HE is!

Now, I'm still not the world's greatest parent. My child doesn't shrill with pure joy at the sight of vegetables or behave like a perfect angel 100% of the time, but I'm honored that the LORD entrusted me with the craziest, most tender-hearted 2 year old little boy. HE will not leave me high and dry with Adelyne either. HE is the perfect FATHER and I'm grateful to glean knowledge, strength and energy from HIM.

This also applies in my roles as wife, missionary, friend... and even in my, uuummm, "growing" state.

How about you? Do you struggle with insecurities? Spend some time understanding WHO GOD is and WHO you are IN HIM. (John 1:12, Eph. 1 - and the whole book really, Romans 15:7, 1 Cor.6:17, etc.).

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Monday through Wednesday of this past week were dedicated completely to Biblical counsel training. Both Robersy and I are thankful to Lily House and their leadership team for giving us the opportunity to better prepare for our areas in ministry.

Thursday was a busy day with baseball for Robersy and teaching for myself. Josiah even went out with me to San Jose and loooooved seeing all the animals and playing with the kids out there. 

We were blessed to spend some time with one of our favorite mission teams on Thursday evening. Syracuse, NY always sends us some of the best! And following dinner a few of the ladies joined myself and the street team for ministry in Boca Chica. We experienced some interesting things, but we are so grateful for GOD's protective hand over the team.

Friday night we had Omar, from San Jose, come and preach at youth group and heard some testimonies from the Syracuse team too.

Saturday, Robersy and I were thankful to double date to the movies after baseball practice, while Josiah enjoyed a slumber party with one of his favorite people in the world :)

Sunday was spent out in Bani visiting Robersy's family along with GAP student, Matt.

ANNNNND here we are!!! Monday. A public holiday. We are ready to rest!

A busy week, but a great week! 

We await new adventures this week and continue to rest in HIM, HIS promises and of course... blessed by who HE is!!!

Matt playing "pool" with Josiah and Josiah's cousin, Anderson.

Some of the Syracuse team.

Adelyne Grace

Adelyne Grace. Since so many of you have asked if we've decided on a name for our little princess, we thought it was a good time to share. There's a bit of confusion of how big she really is at the moment, since one website says a cabbage and the other a zucchini and even while I'm writing this a pop-up on my phone says an asparagus, but I am the size of a small elephant so we're just gonna call her BIG! We're 30 weeks down and if she's anything like her brother... just 12 weeks to go. 

A LOT has happened since we chatted over a cup of coffee, so go on... get your latte and let's catch up!

About a month ago we were awaiting a group from Faith Christian school, beginning to move, packing to go to my sister's wedding, keeping up with our regular ministries... oh, and growing a baby :) It was a busy time and we were thankful for a few days following my sister's wedding to just SIT and rest before returning to the crazy!

I'm not going to lie and say, "OH, it's been a breeze." There has been blood, sweat and plenty of hormonal tears as we've been trying to settle in to our new home. There are no 24 hour services to get things done so we've had to settle the best we can and waaaaiiiiittttttttt for the rest to come together. To tell you the truth, we did not want to move. We LOVE Boca Chica, but we were diving in to our savings every month to cover the gas since our regular support doesn't cover it. This was vital for our family and ministry, but I still do look forward to my Thursday trips out to the streets to pour in to the lives of the women there.

Faith Christian was a highlight for us this year (as they are each year) and both Robersy and I enjoyed the time we were able to spend with them. From village outreach, food distribution and even a whale watching excursion I was impressed at these young American teenagers with an excitement to serve the LORD.

I've found the same true amongst our own teens lately and I'm encouraged, though there are differences in language and culture, how God is cultivating groups of young people all around the world to advance HIS Kingdom. 

Just last night I was sitting at SCORE night (an evening when all the groups serving with SCORE come together to share what the LORD is doing in and through them during their mission trip) with groups and individuals who had been serving in Ramon Santana, Santo Domingo and Constanza... as well as a group of Dominican young people from our church (and junior leaders with the youth) leading the music, a young Dominican single mom there to help sell items for a ministry, an intern who will be here until August serving in various ministries and a few missionaries working in various area. I just thought HOW COOL to be surrounded so many that people desire to serve CHRIST OUR SAVIOUR! 

BE ENCOURAGED! We can be so disheartened while we watch the news and hear about disaster all around us. But there is HOPE! Just take the time to look around.

Instead of bombarding you with a month's worth of reading, I figure it's easier to post some photos. ENJOY!

Youth Sunday! Proud of our teens.

School outreach with Faith Christian.

Proof that the missionaries, bus drivers and translators get to rest sometimes :)

Saving on airfare...

Just kidding... we took him ON the plane :)

All ready for the BIG DAY!!!

My sweet nephew, Abraham, couldn't be there for
the wedding due to his surgery, but he's healing SO WELL. Thank YOU for your prayers!!!
He stayed at Ronald McDonald House so I bought him a hamburger pillow as a souvenir :)

PRESENTING, Mr. and Mrs. Simmons!